Choc, Have you done everything? Is she done? Has she had a sudden change of heart? Is she willing to do absolutely whatever it takes to rebuild (counseling, etc.)? I think I know what the answers are, but perhaps Cobra needs to hear the current state.
NH,
Her "sudden change of heart" occurred this weekend, after she was served with the divorce papers on Friday. On Saturday she supposedly pulled back again from the sexual/romantic part of her affair relationship (she has done this twice before, only to head straight back into a full-blown PA), and on Sunday she began acting nice to me and begging me not to go for custody of the boys.
I really don't care to go into a whole bunch of details here to justify my decisions, but let's just say that I'm a big fan of the old Ronald Reagan quote, "trust -- but verify." Upon verification, neither of my wife's two weekend "epiphanies" would seem to be sincere. And even if they were, there does come a point at which a decision becomes "too little, too late." If the only thing I can do to get my wayward wife to end a sexual affair with another man, and to stop being bitchy and stubbornly entitled toward me, is spend $2,500 on legal fees and serve her with divorce, well, then I really don't have much of a marriage worth saving, now do I?
