Interestingly that you should mention this fearless because that is exactly what H and I have said to the MC on several occasions, thinking it was a "good thing" when in fact, it is a bad thing because MC said (and I am quoting here) that if one is up and one is down, you never have a chance to really connect and understand the other person because you are always in two different places in your R.
I think Schnarch would agree. You can see all the sex-killing dynamics that can develop along these lines such as placator/placatee, parent/child, moper/cheerer-upper, or plain old HD/LD etc. OTOH, if you think about any sexual dynamic that operates from the same level such as being naughty kids together or sophisticated adults or grinning muscular animals it's much hotter and more connected. Although, it almost certainly would have bespoken a different sort of dysfunction, it would have been a lot more "sexy" if in response to my 2bx's comments like "you are too nerdy to f*ck" I had responded by saying "Yeah, well you are too f*cking uptight to f*ck. I guess I just forgot for a moment. My bad." because then we would have been on the same level.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
