Hey Dave. Just popping in to let you know I think you're doing a GREAT job. YOu KNOW what you need to do. You KNOW it's not easy, and you don't have any expectations. Your understanding is spot-on. You DO see W making tentative baby teeny tiny steps back to you, yes? She's trying to slide in thru the doggie door, but she's coming back 'home' just the same (IMO). (Sunny will surely put her glass down soon to post some of her latest developments in that regard as well.)
As for the sleeping arrangemens, I can TOTALLY understand your reticense and uncomfortableness and anxiety about W spending so much time - and esp. sleeping overnights - at home after this time. While I like idea of finding alternative sleeping arrangemens for yourself, I don't think you should go thru all the trouble & obviousness of getting a blow-up or other mattress, but casually offer W the bed while you take the couch. It's not a big deal, and it's only for one night. W cannot expect that you will find it comfortable to be in the bed w/her, and you do not want even the OPPORTUNITY for "anything else" to happen that night. Honestly! Why set yourself up for creating stress and strain & tension and expectations and all that.
Sunny just said, "But when do you set yourself up for the "anything else" stuff?" and I told her (in my obviously wonderful experience o/c) that it should NOT be on the night of D's sleepover, on the first night W is back 'home' on whatever pretext, and at the first sign of anything where W MIGHT BE changing her mind about you, the M or your R. Give it time. And STILL be mysterious. Keep her guessing (or, as we like to say in StillMe Land: Mess With Her Head, Dude!)
