Wife gone...Is there hope (Part 2)

[Heimlich]

Now, here's what i'm not so sure about...Do I tell her it's not my choice to get a D but will go along with it but make it clear that it is her choice.

Strange,
Why even hint that you're OK with the divorce? Some variation of the above is the way to go, I think. The only reason to go with your second alternative is pride. Reminds me of that quote from Pulp Fiction, when Marcellus Wallace is talkign to Butch about throwing the fight, "You might feel a little sting. That's pride. F**k pride."

I had a similar talk with my W last week. Said something along the lines of, "I still love you. I still think we can have a wonderful life together, though I realize there are no guarantees and I think it's a shame that we won't get to find that out. I think I'm finally at a place again where I can be the partner you deserve. That said, I know how you feel. I'm not going to stand in your way if you want to continue with the D."

Since I've said that, things have improved marginally. Though it's hard to tell because she's out of town and it might just have been relief on her part.

Good luck,

BD