You look like you're well detached from him and found a way to take care of yourself and your family without quickly driving yourself off the deep end.
Actually I would say I am more open to my H then I have been in more years then I can count lol.
Things that use to frustrate me. Like him bitching about his weight while he sat eatting plates full of food in front of the tv. His need to dominate and feel superior his hypocrispy even the simple fact he cannot take care of a bill. Though sad in my opinion Is who he is. And by excepting him for who he is and not expecting him to be anything other then that. Regaurdless period and excepting he is not gonna turn into this person I want him to be has made it so much easier to be in this relationship. On the odd day that he gets up and is motivated to do something I praise him so he knows I took notice. On the usual days when he sits in front of the TV all day. I just smile and go on with my day.
I can either enjoy the surprise of the odd days or wallow in the dissapointment of the normal days. I elect to do the first. I just expect him to be him and it leads to not being dissapointed in him. Keeping me in a better mind frame towards him.
I get up every day now knowing he is gonna bitch at the kids about some petty crap, That he is gonna sit in the den all day. That he is gonna feel the need to boss someone around or cut someone down. No more waking up hoping today is gonna be the day he starts being nice to everyone. That he picks up his stuff prior to yelling at the kids for not picking up theres. That he does what needs to be done around the house. I have let go of the unrealistic belief it is gonna happen and guess what without feeling the disappointment every day of the fact it did not. I am much happier with what is.
I have learned we have to balance what we have with what we want. That nothing in life does not have a price that we have to pay. We can either bitch about it or we can except that we have to pay it and be happy for what the price brings us.
So I am not really not a LD person. I am a HD person who has a sucky bed partner. So I am not a filty person but live in a filty house.(by my own standards) So I am not a person who likes drama or every day strife yet am married to a person that thrives on it. And this list could go on but.... I wanted my children back in my everyday life. The price I am paying for that gift is worth what I have gained.
