True to my word, I never sent my wife another Relationship e-mail after my one on 6/16 -- hard for a verbose wordsmith like "the old Choc." to do, but "New Choc." knew it was necessary.
In any event, after she was served the papers on Friday, I left her this note by her sink on Saturday night:
Susan,
I'm extremely saddened and disappointed that our marriage has come to this, but I must move on with my life. The lack of affection over the past 15+ years -- and especially the last 5 -- has drained away much of my love for you, and your choices these last two months have now snuffed out what was left.
You're obviously no longer happy in our marriage either.
As you know it was NOT my desire to divorce, but I can now exit our marriage with a clean conscience, knowing that I gave it everything I had to try and save it. While you may not have agreed with my tactics or the way I handled some of my efforts, I did, nevertheless, give great effort, and I hope you will realize one day that everything I did, I did to try and save our marriage, protect our children, and keep our family intact.
I have no regrets.
And I will continue to fight for what I believe is in their best interests, as well as to protect myself.
I must now move on. As much as I WANTED to be married to you, I realize now that I no longer NEED to be, nor can I, knowing how you feel about me and knowing the things that you've chosen to do. I do pray that you'll find whatever it is you're looking for, and that you'll do it in a safe and healthy way and somehow allow God to be in the middle of it. I do very much still care for you, and genuinely want you to be happy.
