When's it my turn?

[SDFoundGirl]

Thanks, Jen. I really, really get what you say about "there" being movable. I have to remind myself that when H is in a different space, it's not "all about me." And when I'm in a weird place, it doesn't mean I'm reverting to old SD or the R is doomed. It's crazy.

So, things are great. Speaking what I want in I-messages is a 180 for me, and just the speaking of it makes me feel better. H has stepped up big time. Things have been great fun on this end for the most part. I had a great weekend:

*Pool party w/friends on Friday (H went to a great concert, so excited to tell me about it)
*Marched in a parade w/colleagues, went to a colleague/friend's house to make lunch, drink a few, and play games on Saturday
*Loooong hike (7 miles!) w/H on Sunday at a place we've never been before, then my journaling class. Came home, H had picked up dinner for me, ML even though we were both sore as hell from hiking.

I feel like I'm finally letting last summer go. H says I'm less "pointy" than I have been for the past couple of weeks. I reminded him I told him I was working on letting all that cr@p go, that it was tough and brought up some icky things for me, but that I was sorry I'd let it spill out in any way on him.

I'm feeling freer, stronger. I recognized SO MANY times this weekend where I would have felt freaked out and afraid...and I just went with the flow instead. Hung out with new people, got to know people I've wanted to know better, cast off so much old baggage.

Life is good, and I'm strong enough to handle it.

SD