A year in the making

[Crazy Eddie]

Now this is were my perfect story takes a twist. We had been having problems with S14 his behavior blah blah which was nothing new. But around March is when I found out about the H going out drinking all the time leaving the kids alone all the time. Via S14. Also with the increased amount of time I was with my kids I discovered how unadjusted they were to our situation how unhappy they were and how little respect even S16 now had for there dad. Due to his drinking not working and so forth.
So the control freak I am (yes Blackfoot you were right about that) I started stepping in. Which is when I discovered that my house was about to be forclosed on Rich was about to loose his job and the electic and water was only days from being shut off.

This is were control freak. I want my own life. And responsibile Chrissy all clashed. Responsible Chrissy won out.
I am now back home with my kids and H. Been here for nearly two months now.I did all the work to save my H's job.

How did you do that? Pushing him to go to work somehow? Talking to his boss?

Instead of being 5 months behind in the mortgage we are now 6 weeks and the other bills are caught up.
The house is still up for sale but not being shown while I finish the repairs that needed done for 2 years plus.
S14 is being put in a wilderness camp to get the therapy he desperately needs. Even though it is breaking my heart I am making it happen. Its what is best for him.

I am stronger then I was a year ago. I am still not taking any of the H's [censored]. I am making him be responsible to come up with the money to catch up the mortgage. Though I am the one dealing with the hows and the doing of it again.

How are you making him "be responsible to come up with the money to catch up the mortgage"? Threats? Encouragement of some kind? Quid pro quo?

And more to the point, how long can you keep it up? How old is your youngest? If your H is going along with the program grudgingly, I'd expect him to fall off the wagon sooner rather than later... and to hide it from you until the electricity or the water is shut off.

And guys 'It is what it is'. I made the choice to come back to do what I felt was right for everyone else. So what I gave up to do so was based on free will and choice not the threats that kept me here for so long. So I have excepted that my h is who he is he is not changing. Our marriage is what it is. And what I have is not really what I want but. I have excepted the fact that I am responsible for my own happiness or unhappiness and my choices were to be where I am. And I am gonna be as happy with it is possible

Good. Find happiness where you can. Don't expect to get through this on sheer determination... make sure you have a life outside of this home that brings you joy and strength.