Thanks 100 times Rob. I agree that, a while ago, I was motivated to GAL's by a focus on fixing the marriage. My thinking now is that I am working on ME - becoming the person that I want to become. If she decides to ditch OM and join me, then we will work on fixing what we have and move forward. If she doesn't, well, I have made improvements in my life, external and internal, and I will just get on with my life, and be a better (more attractive, more confident, etc) person for it. Given the progress I have made and her state of mind, I like my chances.
You wrote: "I'm not saying full disclosure is necessary - a little mystery is a great thing. But when that mystery starts to become the POINT of the activity, you're missing the boat."
Agree 100% that I fumbled on Friday night. I was unnecessarily deceptive. It wasn't a disaster, and sure wasn't a backslide. But I agree that I need to stop being concerned about what she thinks about what I do... and just do the GAL activities.
Also agree she is VERY scared. I came into some information last night that confirms this. She is physically very clingy when she is with OM, and says "tell me you love me" regularly (it's a long story how I found this out). She is not in love with him, she is infatuated with him, and is behaving like a 14 year old girl. (BTW, we had a small disagreement on Sunday morning and she actually said "Takes one to know one!!!" Yes, she really said it. I stifled a laugh, which made her even angrier. Couldn't help it...)
Again, thanks Rob. I have time, and I have patience. My kids are my motivation!
