H sees it as wrong, says he feels guilty about it and yet is convinced that given the same circumstances and feelings about our M, he'd do it again. Maybe just fear of his own weakness and wanting to prevent it in the future by not ever being in that same situation??
My H said almost the exact same thing the first time he "came back home to me". He said he did not really regret what he had done since he was unhappy and this made him happy - she was a good friend. Looking back now he was not over her and I should have known better. Now he fully admits it was the biggest mistake of his life and he wishes it had never happened - he could not say that before.
I think your H needs to be with her full time - to see what his OW is really like. The sooner he comes to his senses the sooner you two can really work on your M.
It sounds like you are making some positives steps in taking care of yourself and that is great! Keep it up! It's not until I truly let my H go and he saw me moving on (and saw his OW's true nature) that he realized he was risking losing everything. I just had to be prepared to walk away for good and I was 90% there. If my H did not show some changes by the end of July I was going to start mediation proceedings. I had several houses lined up and was preapproved for a mortgage on my income alone. Mentally I was getting to the end point - it will come for you too.
YOU WILL BE FINE WITH or W/O your H - you are an awesome person who deserves so much more!! Have a great week!
HB
Me41 H44 * M16 yrs * D13 S10 8/06 H wants a D * 1/07 OW Truth 2/07 Searated * 7/07 H moved home First Thread Surviving Separation Now Piecing
