I don't really have the motivation/ambition to journal right now, let alone turn out a second rough draft at the moment. Just got back from a movie and am going for a bike ride for a while -- likely won't journal until tomorrow. Will say that W asked me to drop the kids off at her "new" place (OM's) for the first time. Got a pretty NMA right now and am just really discouraged. It's hard sticking with the plan to talk with W next week about postponing the D, but I know that I've got to. Don't want to because I don't really see anything good coming from it, and if it does come I don't believe it'll come for a very long time. I'm starting to not want to help W in the settlement (mediation agreement still not signed) simply because I'm possibly setting her AND OM/OM's kids up to live well, vs just her and our kids. I know that deep down it is selfish and and controlling to pull back because of this, but I am so devastated by the reality of this whole thing. I know that I must continue on because my line isn't drawn here. I will not give up -- I just need some perspective right now.
Kind of turned into more than I intended, but I will go into greater detail about everything tomorrow. Thanks for reading my brief vent.
