Not sure how to read this evening so I am going to try to not read much into it.
I took the girls over at 6 which is our handoff time. Tough since I won't see them for the next two weeks except for an occasional moment here and there. On Saturday my wife had invited me to dinner tonight, which I gladly accepted. We had a good but typical family dinner. After dinner we got the girls in the bath and finally to bed. She invited me to stay to watch a movie she had rented, "if I wanted to". She's said that with ever invitation, like I'd decline. So the movie was Miss Potter with Renee Zellweger. It was the true story of Beatrix Potter. Kind of sad and happy at the same time. She was a single 32 year old society woman at the turn of the century in London. She fell in love with her publisher and her parents forced a summer long separation in an effort to break things up. He ends up dying that summer. In the end she ends up marrying another man some eight years later. It was a really good movie and a nice heartwarming story. So if you can, rent it.
When I went to leave she was a bit more distant and didn't give that big hug that she's been giving lately. Ah the pullback. But I saw it, I saw it in her eyes or at least I believe it. She's put the guard up a bit even with her saying she enjoyed the evening and company. She's thinking, she's processing.
As I drove off she was standing in the kitchen waiting to turn off the outside lights. She stood by the windows and waved. Yes to me this is important because we have always stood by these floor to ceiling windows and waved to one another. But when she was most distant she would just cut the lights out not wait for me to even get in the car and walk away.
I can't get excited about any of this but it does feel like a good baby step forward. Now if we can only knock out about a 1000 more and get to that wonderful place together.
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
