You are so right. Too bad you're preaching to the choir. Both individuals have to be willing to engage in that kind of frank discussion, but I don't think his WAW is willing/able to do so.
She's not, none (or very few) of them are. They have to be willing to break down that wall they have built up over the past who knows how many years. The wall is HUGE - it's the Berlin Wall (but even that came down ;-) ). It'll have to come down brick by brick, not many of us have the necessary wrecking ball to demolish it in one shot, unfortunately. The fear involved with being vulnerable with us is immense - they CAN'T go back to what was, in the relationship. We have to be in a place where we can provide a safe environment for them to come out from behind the wall and be vulnerable with us. And us with them - to move forward (on their timeline).
If all this isn't a screaming cry for relationship education in High School or something, I don't know what is.
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
