Originally Posted By: CVA How stupid have i been for not doing this all along, not treating my wife like the piece of fine china that she is, and acting like the world revolves around me. All the pain i was in is no excuse, just a lame reason i used to rationalize my ranting and raving.
I can totally relate to this statement. It's so hard not to keep kicking myself about what a selfish, childish imbecile I was. At least we have recognized it and are doing our best to change.
I'm in this boat with you guys. It's hard to forgive ourselves for screwing things up so back and hurting our Ws the way we did and for so long. However, forgive we must, because it is difficult to move on if we continue to relive that past us. The C that I saw for 3 months after my W left back in November once told me that I have to "own my mistakes, and release them." It took a little while for me to realize the good this does, but I finally understood (guess I wasn't ready to release them yet -- needed to grief over them still). I still wince from time to time over them, but I just remind myself to own and release, and it gets better fast.
