Did you say anything supportive about changing to the racing shop? I know it might have been hard lifting your jaw off the ground to talk. But, maybe, something like,
"H, it is sooooo worth the drop in income for you to get a chance to do more of what you love! I just want you to know that I really support you in that and really respect the skill you have that makes those opportunities available to you."
Oldtimer - yeah, definitely huge! I sure hope he follows through with it. My jaw was, as you say, pretty much on the ground - but when he described the racing shop I did say "Wow that would be really cool!" Ok, not as eloquent as what you said, but supportive.. .
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
Thanks for the idea. I'm trapped in a conference call for another 2 hours almost, but I'm emailing her to see if it's ok to pass on her number. If it is and you'd like it - can you email me at nikkib@surewest.net so I can forward it on? I'm going to call her once I get off this conference call too.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
Thanks for calling her. Although I am more tempted than you know to take you up on your offer, right now, offline, offboard communication with DBers really just won't fit into my life. I hope you both understand. I do care though, so give her a hug from me too when you have the time.
On another note, egad, what is up with the monster conference call?
thanks Nikki for sharing that with me, I almost felt like crying when I read that!
I agree that you need to not walk on eggshells and stop trying to be perfect. Be YOU. I'm sure you weren't walking on eggshells when you guys first got together, and that you weren't perfect then...like who is anyways!? so I'm glad to hear your not focusing on that anymore.
Hey, we need some more males on your myspace page!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
OMG! That is soo huge Nikki! I will pray pray pray for that to happen!
I wouldn't be overly excited in front of H though, but would definitely validate and praise for such a step. That would be wonderful for him to be in an environment that has more of his passions for cars.
yes, definitely don't get your hopes up, but wow, what a step this is!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
OT - I keep getting a fast busy when I try to call Donna, so not sure if it's her phone or the network (or I have the # wrong.. I have it but hadn't tried to call before). I dropped her an email though with hugs from us both, and left her my #.
The monster conf call is the "here's all the stuff we think you should know about the entire company" call... I think people listen to about 50% and nap/email the rest of the time. We've actually heard people SNORING before when they forgot to mute their phone. Always lightens the mood though.
ST You're welcome! I knew you'd like that.
Yep yep, definitely need to lighten up and get back to being ME, not me on eggshells. I feel a lot more relaxed since deciding to do that and really following through. I've decided it a few times but now I'm really doing it, and it helps.
H is already backpedaling on the job thing.. heard some bad things about the boss/owner. BUT, after that and me saying I was disappointed for him, he said "But they're also opening a whole new repair section at [XYZ dealership] and I've heard great things about there." So... I am still very excited. I thought at first it was more of a "work with racecars" thing but now it sounds more like a "get away from where I am" thing. Fingers are crossed.
haha what, not enough guys on my myspace?? It's funny it just happens that a lot of the couples I know only the guy has a myspace, so between that and H's friends, my friends list looks really funny. The one guy on there Mikey is cool - I knew him probably 12 years ago and he builds guitars. Just recently ran into him in physical therapy (he had a similar leg break to mine) and found out he's got a new band that just won a big local award. We're going to their show tomorrow night. Should be a lot of fun!! (and not in any "flirty" kinda way whatsoever, guy's been happily married for 20+ years and brags about his W ALL the time)
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
oops, I never even looked to see how many guys you have on there! haha...
well, it does seem to think that your H is looking for a way out. Just continue making it seem like HIS idea, and encouraging him in a good way, but not overdoing it. IMHO that is. and I would never ever bring it up unless he does.
okay, have a great evening!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Hey Nikki just wanted to drop in on you and see how you are doing. As usual I am a bit behind but H the possibility moving on to a different job sounds promising! Sounds like you are handling it great and being supportive.
LOL I've not had any con calls near as long as 2 hours but I know what you mean about people sleeping or doing anything but listening on them.
Hope you are doing well!!
Me: 31; H: 30 Together 11y; M 8y H left: 2/1/07 My Thread 1st Thread
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