Why do these things happen VII

[sadhearted]

She could have asked for just him.... Go have fun and let her see what she's missing.

I need to take my own advice this weekend.

[Sara]

Of all the sitch's that I've read here, I think you have the best chance of getting back together with your wife in the near future. I think she has definitely noticed the change in you, and I think she is starting to test the water again. So just keep up doing what you're doing. I think the tide is turning for you.

[catfan]

Go slow with her, accept her invitation and go with ZERO expectations. Its just dinner and that's it. Don't expect discussions about your marriage or relationship, don't expect discussions about her activities, don't expect any physical intimacy, don't expect hugs, hand holding, kisses etc. And absolutely do nothing in any way, shape or form that can be construed as pursuit.

Now go in expecting a good meal, good company, and good conversation. Be happy, be kind, considerate, be a little mysterious and friendly.

In other words do NOTHING that would create pressure on her or make her uncomfortable and do things that make everyone comfortable.

[789]

She could have asked for just him.... Go have fun and let her see what she's missing.

I need to take my own advice this weekend.

You and I are both good at saying, just not at doing aren't we.

[789]

Of all the sitch's that I've read here, I think you have the best chance of getting back together with your wife in the near future.

I hope you are a good with your hunches.
Thanks, I know it is just written words, but it is those type of words that always keeping my spirit up overall and making me feel we will come out of this intact.

I think she has definitely noticed the change in you, and I think she is starting to test the water again. So just keep up doing what you're doing. I think the tide is turning for you.

I shall, I am not going to change my ways now. I would in the past jump at a chance for dinner or something before she could finish asking a question, that is why I told her I would let her know tomorrow, but I am going.

[789]

Very good advice catfan, I shall go using those principles and thoughts.
Now all I need to do is figure out were to go for dinner, nothing cheap, but also nothing fancy or romantic, guess Taco Bell is out of the question.

[sadhearted]

Yeah guess we need to practice the doing part.

[789]

Well it was decided, dinner and a movie with the all 3 of us. Going to see Harry Potter and just pick up some quick food on the way.
I will go with no expectations of any kind, will try to be myself in the best fashion that I can. Will tell you my heart will be smiling inside while with her. My son is so excited that all of us are going together and it was his moms idea. So weird that the we are all going, been a long long time.

Shall return in a few hours.

[789]

Well we went to dinner, thankfully I went with no expectations, not one would have been met.
I know it is wrong, but I want to hate her, I want not to love her any longer, I want the pain just to vanish. I tried to think of ways to hate her and I couldn't, she has never done anything to hate but this, and this is not her fault, it is mine. I try to think of ways that I shouldn't love her, that does not work either.
Guess I am just an old sap who can't give up that hope.

[sadhearted]

You know there are times that I wish I could be more like my H. To walk around like this doesn't bother me, not care, not feel, not be concerned about what this is doing to our family. Then I think but I don't really want to do that because then we'd definitely be over if neither of us give a crap.

I don't know guess we should just sit back do what we have to do for us and hope in the end our spouses come too. Some days are just harder then others.