Almost Walked Away Wife

[Dom R]

Hi Sandi,
i just found "your thread" here, after posting to you in someone else's thread. oops!

moving it...

I cry because I don't know if I will ever be able to let my H touch me sexually again. I cry because I sent the OM away and I may never experience that kind of sexual excitement again.

Of course you will Sandi...

It wont be "exactly the same", because no relationship is exactly the same. but it will be there.

your excitment follows your heart. You gave your heart to someone else. That someone else is no longer in your life (and thank God for that).


your heart is empty now. there is no place for your sexual energy to go right now.
you are in "withdrawal" from your affair with the OM. you are grieving it. it takes weeks, sometimes months.

Give yourself time to recover, without expectations. Just leave your heart open to your husband. let him fill it again.
Then in time, your desire will return.

"A watched pot never boils."

Keeping a "watch" on your sexual desire, i think is a sure way to keep it smothered. Just be open to your husband... sit next to him.. hug him if you feel like it... and in time, you will be ok again, if he is treating you well.

It has happened to many many people this way. it will happen this way for you. hang in there.

Yes, I believe in setting goals. Right now, I'm not sure of what to set for a goal. I don't have the mindset for it. I guess because I feel so depressed today. I'm just trying to survive a day at a time.

May i suggest: a goal of spending time being "physically close" to your husband, in a simple non-sexual way, every day.
10 minutes of just sitting together, with his arm around you, or vice versa, watching TV, or whatever else. Part of the goal being, to feel good that there is someone next to you who cares about you, and loves you, and that you can appreciate that about him.