Living with my WAW 3

[SuperDad]

Journalling:
July 13-15th: Drove to FL Panhandle and stayed on the beach. It was really beautiful and I had a great time, playing with kids, eating great seafood, etc. W was there and it was not unpleasant. We of course slept in separate beds, each with 1 of the boys. She and I shared a glass of wine on the balcony on both of the evenings which was pleasant, but uneventful.

Two things of note happened:
1. We had very different ideas about when we would leave on Sun. (she wanted to go at 6 am, me at 11am). Her motive was that she wanted to get to her sister's earlier which was another 2.5 hr drive beyond my parents, where she was dropping us off.

She first mentioned this when we arrived on Fri. I told her that we could talk about it later and I did not want to start the weekend with an arguement, but rather wanted to enjoy it! (Strike when the iron is cold!)

On sat. evening we discussed it again and came to a compromise to leave after we had breakfast and went for a walk on the beach. Low stress, compromise is a totally new thing in our 15 years of marriage. Usually one of us gets their way and the other resents it (usually me). A nice baby step I think.

2. I started initiating light physical contact, with no follow up other than maybe eye contact. Once on the balcony at sunset and once in the car ride to TX. She did not respond negatively, but also did not say anything at all. In the car, I gently ran my finger under her chin as she was driving and I was sitting in the passenger seat, looking at her profile. She looked over in my eyes and gave a cute look, but did not say anything. I then diverted my attention to the kids.

This is an experiment that I am hoping will confuse her a bit and hopefully add to her questioning her decision to drop out of our R. I am trying to add in a bit of flirting, just like if I were trying to move from friendship to dating in another relationship, but to do it in a casual way. I also am going to do this with other women when the opportunity presents itself, so that she sees that I am ready to go to the next step.

In the meantime, she dropped me and the kids off at my parents and I have left on my business trip. I will not call her at all on the trip and will communicate via email, only as required to work out our plans for the next weeks in TX.

As for GALing, I am still a bit jet lagged, but plan on a big weekend (travel from Berlin to Prague with some friends and then fly back to Cologne to go back to work on Sun.).

In my free time, I am trying to work on assessing the status of my goals and revise them (it has been 4 months since I first set them and progress has been about 50/50). I will post this in my next journal entry.

As always, I appreciate your input.

SD