It is finally out, he wants a D

[HSSweetheart]

That is too funny!!!! Concidence? I wonder. Divine intervention? I certainly hope so!!!!! Like you said, doing well? Well, maybe more well than another day perhaps.

How are things in Texas? I went to a Home Interiors seminar last year in Dallas. Didn't get to see much though, but I know it is a big state.

[sadhearted]

Yeah doing well is um... Just when I think I am I have a bad day or hour..

Wish something like that had happened when my H decided to move out. No such luck. Though all he took were the clothes he needed. Everything else is still here. Another reason people tell me he's not done. I don't know we'll see. I must say the last 3 days I've been dong well with my emotions. I've been more calm and positive then before.

[HSSweetheart]

I think you can only be in one state for so long. I was in a good mood on Saturday when my H said he had something to tell me that might bring me down. Don't tell me I immediately said. I didn't want to ruin a good day. Turned out it was actually good news for me that he is staying longer. I know the day will come when I lose it again, but for now I am riding this good wave--as far as it takes me.....

[sadhearted]

Yeah that's what I'm doing. Though at the moment it's starting to feel like it's about to fade away. Should reread my positives list or something.

[HSSweetheart]

I personally try not to think about "things" or I know I will slip into depression again. That time will come when he leaves, I know I'll be crying myself to sleep. I only wish he was.....

[sadhearted]

Yeah trying to keep my mind occupied. working a jigsaw puzzle, playing a game, housework... Nothing exciting but things I like.

I've said the same about my H. I wish he were crying as much as me. Thing is I don't KNOW if he is or not. There were times when he was here that he's told me he cried in the shower or going to sleep and I never knew it. I know he's no happier or sanier then when he left. He's told me that. Just wish he'd realize just maybe I'm not the whole reason he feels like he does and give us another chance. One day hopefully.

[HSSweetheart]

My H actually called me on my cell on the way to work to tell me to be careful driving in the rain. And he doesn't care anymore he says?

[sadhearted]

Another example of why we don't believe what they say.

[HSSweetheart]

My H last night started saying things that he did wrong in his life--but said he wasn't including me in that list. Also said he was moving out no matter what at some point, some how. When he mentioned that he would be in his rental house by now I said I knew a place where there was love that he could live. I just don't understand it. He is obviously screwed up in more ways than just me. Regrets things, has no interested in his music anymore, thinks he is old and life is basically done, etc. Really depressing stuff. I told him he did very well with what he has, kids and family I meant. He still thinks he is a big failure. So how much of this is actually me? Makes me wonder......

[sadhearted]

My H feels like a failure too. I think alot of their problem is within them and not us. Sure we have done things or failed them in some way but that's not WHAT their problem is. Who knows if they'll figure that out or not. So I think we may be a small part of it but not the big issue. And certainly not as big as what they want to think or make us out to be.