I didn't think I would make it one month...then two, three...finally I thought how can my life go on without H???
That is when I had to take responsibility for my OWN HAPPINESS...this wasn't easy...it wasn't steady either...good days and bad...but eventually it got easier...I surrounded myself with supporting friends...I made sure I did things that were fun...I avoided anything depressing...I stopped watching Oprah, the news, sad shows....I just couldn't take it...I had to focus on life and what was enjoyable...I had to take time to smell the roses...my new job that I got after H left helped me...I started driving a school bus for special needs children...I saw how their families coped...how they were happy, had a life, and found joy for themselves...
Happiness doesn't revolve around another person...it is something you share...my H wasn't happy so therefore he couldn't share his happiness...and I wasn't happy when I left so I had nothing to offer to him either...eventually we both worked on being happy in our own life...then we put the two together again...it wasn't perfect...it wasn't a "whew, glad that is over" moment...but it was our beginning...
It also helped for me to have compassion for my H...I knew..KNEW in my heart that he was being tortured inside...as angry and hurt as I was I also felt sorry for him...I think this also helped me to hold on to my love for him...
Sandi...sorry your having a bad day...I hope you read my post to you on your post...your are worth it...remember that...you can do this...you WANT to and that is more then half the battle... Stay focused...as much as possible...keep journaling on your post and you will keep receiving a steady stream of support just for you..
