I think it might be worthwhile to spend some time researching counselors, until you've found a person with a lot of experience dealing with couples and their communication issues. Couples counseling seems to be very different, and more difficult, than counseling one person alone.
My H and I went to see a very pleasant lady, a good listener, a smart woman--and yet we never even talked about my husband's affair. We chatted about how we needed to spend more time together. My H talked a lot about Buddhism, for some reason. It was not helpful, although I learned a lot about Buddhism.
So, having read accounts of excellent counselors on some of these threads, I think that the right person can make all the difference.
