In regards to the recent conversation, I must say I can live w/o my H. I just prefer not to. If our rolls were reversed and he was the one who had the lower sex drive I don't think I would love him any less. I'd be as frustrated as he is with me currently, but my heart wouldn't change.
I see how he interacts with his children, how he's always ready to lend a hand, etc and I love him more. My H is a good person with a good heart and that's why I love him.
Understand the value of love. The physical part, in my limited experience, can be great. However, if my H was suddenly incapable of performing the act it wouldn't lessen my love for him. I love him for what he is. That I think is the difference. To me, loving is emotional. The physical comes second.
In regards to my own martyr complex, I actually feel guilty if my H begins cleaning or lending a hand. Like I've failed. This is just one of those things I've got to get over.
I'm trying to teach my D to help. She's 4 but does have her own chores to do. My SS (16/18) are another issue. Any stepparent knows there is a fine line you have to walk. I've been told on more than one occassion to not involve myself. But in the next breath it's can you pick up so and so or do this for the boys.
Me 35 H 41 M 10 years Together 12 years D,6 SS, 17,19
