You are doing better than you think. As long as you can continue to be close to her, have good times together, even just get through the daily grind together without a big argument, you are winning.
She thought announcing the affair would put an end to your marriage. You have shown her that you are a bigger man than that. You think of your children's welfare, and that gives you the strength you need to stand up for your marriage.
Strength and integrity like that well outshine whatever she can see in the OM, a man who apparently thinks nothing of seducing a married woman. You don't even need to point out to her that any man that would cheat WITH her will eventually cheat ON her. She will figure that out eventually.
Yes, she will continue to resist. Yes, she will test you with comments about your future apart. Reply with love and confidence.
Bottom line is, every day you can continue living as one family, is one more crack in the facade of this perfect love she thought she found.
