A cross to bear Amy. How your pain resonates through cyberspace.
I hope i'm not out of line with this post, if so I apoligize.
What was the reason for your stand? Guilt? Were you compelled? If so, are you now compelled to quit? You can ANALyze yourself to some degree but as far as others are concerned it is pointless. Isn't that where frustration begins?
Haven't you noticed why people are drawn to you here? STRENGTH!
You say that your H won't change. Haven't you? If you are capable of change and an awakening so are others!
The depression is overwhelming as I have felt it on here for days. The enemy is working in masses, JONESTOWN. Buckup lil' Buckaroo!
You're going to tell your kids WHAT! WTH Amy? If I can see you as a pillar of strength on here I can only imagine the lasting impression you are instilling in your children by your stand. It is consistancy that counts. The kids need to see that making a mistake, (MLC, drinking or whatever), isn't the end and or what we are defined by. It's how we deal with it!
As far as letting H free to date, duh, he knows that he has never needed your permission. Just like you so long ago doing whatever you damn well pleased.
Justification might be the word of the day. Because we are selfish beings we will justify any and all that we do.
Look inside yourself Amy, are you losing your faith? You told me that the enemy will fight like hell when he is losing his grip over you and things will get real bad before they can get better. Is this belief gone? Justify it to GOD!
Have you decided you can do this better than GOD? Be his vessel but let him drive.
You're 38 Amy and have been blessed with so much. You might find it hard to believe this but you have so much more than most.
You have life experiences which most will never have. It sounds like you have packed into your 38 yrs a lifetimes worth of living. I have also lived way to much for my 44 yrs. But people like us have been entrusted with this experience. Not all get to have it. Blessing! It just depends on what we do with it.
Bootstraps girl!!!
cire
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
