Thanks again Snods, I must say I have written in this board more hurridly, 'on the run' really, because I don;t hardly know when I sit down if my phone is going to ring or someone is at my door, or at home, if a thud is going to occur forcing me to drop my sentence in progress and see what the heck just happened. Other times I have more thought I can put in, edit etc. and correct what my laptop may have done to me. I am not on my laptop here for example. The meds thing....uh, yes, I fluctaute and I get pretty damn depressed after ow episodes. I'm much better away from her.
Charcoal, set little goals for yourself and achieve them. These serve as tick marks of your progress and it is quite important to seeing how far you've gotten.(just a helpful tidbit)
You all have helped. You really have. As I said in the mlc area here, I only saw ow accidentally in the cafe today (after 5 days of zero contact) and the 'group' was sitting for lunch and I only briefly joined them. I can feel where I could pull open the bag of feelings for her as she sat across from me and go at it with myself again, but I shrugged the feelings off (are you listening Charcoal?) and ate, was polite and then went about my work. I have found forging ahead in this new direction, much like a snow path which has already been walked through a few times, that it is easier to continue on this rather than fall back where I was and go in a depression circle.
All the answers are there for me. Charcoal, hang in there. It gets better if you forge on the new path and get some distance behind you on the new path.
