Thanks BND & hopefloats7 for your welcoming & encouraging words.
15 years deep, I was oblivious to the fact that I didn't have many friends at all. For the first 8 months, I stayed alone in my house every day & wished away the weekends. Then, I called my cousin that I used to be very close with. She was happy to hear from me & said "come on over". She always has a house full. I don't know what I'd do without her & the rest of her family.
I'm not sure that H is actually coming out of it. He is still somewhat cold, but I have endured way worse. He won't tell ow he is in contact with me. When I asked if he plans to reduce the time they spend together, he told me not to get ahead of what we're doing. I guess that's a big NO.
I have suffered a lot of rejection in the last 2 years. My self esteem has taken quite a beating.
