Nice guy, giver or taker, talking each other’s 5LL, what ever one will labels it, something is off.
Implied in your comments seems to be the idea that the nice guy is defined as a giver. Don’t you know that taking is part of being nice? It allows the other person to give, thus giving him/her the satisfaction of giving. If the nice guy does all the giving, he is not being so nice after all because he is robbing the spouse of that important feeling of giving, which also has some aspects of power to it. So while giving may seem like forgoing all power to the spouse, it could really be the opposite.
Maybe BB feels powerless by you always beating her to being the giver. Maybe you could be nice to her in a different way be letting her give and you being the taker. Sounds scary, huh?
