OM's going through his own D , so what part of knowing how to maintain a relationship do you think he knows ???
Hes as screwed up as your W right now , yes sure hes on his best behaviour for now but him making changes for your W is way different that making changes for himself.
You see you are going through a D but you dont have the distraction of an OW so you are working hard on yourself , for yourself , making lifelong changes. OM is just behaving well right now , I guarantee he has made no real changes and this will show soon enough.
