That kind of sucks about D talking about OM's house, I feel for you. I guess one thing will be that R will get very real very quickly , and what I mean is the day to day stuff will get involved with the R , they will get grumpy and they will fight etc.
Dave,
I hear what you're saying here, but I get this funny feeling that OM is privy to how to make this R last and make W happy. Call me crazy (because he is just getting through his own D), but I have a feeling he has somethings figured out, and the fact that he is 38 and out of shape vs. my W who is 26 and great looking, tells me that he knows he needs to do EVERYTHING right ALL the time if he wants to keep her. This is my worst fear about their R -- that he isn't ignorant to what HE needs to do.
Now, I do get your point about being the OM in their R, and I agree that this is what I need to do (and believe me, I've been doing it!), but with all of my control, anger, and criticism over the last 6 -7 years (aside from the times when she was pregnant -- I was H and parent of the year during these times!) I believe that it will take quite a bit longer for her to believe that I'm a changed person for the better and for the long haul. I just don't think she believes it, and likely thinks it's just a short term ploy to get her back, and that I will revert back to my old ways soon enough.
But, I will make the changes permanent because I will turn them from habitual to natural the longer I practice them.
I MIGHT NOT BUST THIS D, BUT I WILL GET MY W BACK WITH A BRAND NEW MARRIAGE WITH A CLEAN SLATE! I WILL SUCCEED (despite my current sitch and my pessimism to it!)!
Thanks Dave -- I needed that visual for a PMA boost! You rock!
