SD - you've held on to LW tooooo long - time to let her go. You know this and I think you can do this.
But - and I only suggest this - maybe part of letting her go will be discussing your feelings with H? This won't be an R talk, this will be sharing your feelings. I went through this from round about May 18th (go back and read my thread for a refresher). I felt I had done all I could on the DB dance, I had come to the end of my M fixing rope and now it was time to take up the reigns of my life again (whiah I am in the process of doing - eg got a new job!! WOO!)
Anyway - back to you. It may be helpful to explain to H how hurt you felt, but without blaming him. That you realise things between you were bad before and you'd like to work WITH him to ensure that a situation like that doesn't arise again. Remind him you've BOTH been through hell (it's not all roses for the WAS and sometimes us LBS's forget that). It' important to approach this not as a "sh1t wasn't it awful, I was a bee-ach, you were a bar-steward" etc... more as a "life is good now, let's look to the past but with the aim of making the future better".
What do you think about feeling sharing, without blaming H?
Bomb (ILYBINILWY, don't want to be married)Sept05 Seperated Sept/Oct 05 Oct 06 - H recomitted July 11 - I am now a WAW.
