My H has been living with his girlfriend since October, Friday the thirteenth. A date that will live... He had his own place for a while, but she stayed there. Now they've moved in together. He started D talk at about that same time. He and gf work together.
My feeling about this is--if it weren't her, it would be someone else. It's different for you, because your H has only had one affair(?) My husband, since discovering the "high" of affairs--probably about four or five years ago--has been compulsive, to say the least. I don't think that he feels good about himself. But I can't help him.
We have two daughters--one eleven, and one three. H filed for divorce recently, but I haven't done anything much about it. Every time there is a change in our sitch (such as D filed) I get frantic, but then I settle down again. The settling down process is getting quicker and quicker.
Detachment--even if you have to fake it--works like a charm. That's what I feel. It helps that my H has been such an extremist. It's hard to keep wanting someone who's made it so plain that he will never be faithful.
