In need of help II

[789]

Yeah that's what I'm going to do.

On top of all this I'm now attempting potty training. He's doing very well though and at the end of the week I'm going to take us out for lunch. I asked my H if he would be interested in going. He said sure. Another positive. (but keep in mind he's done lol)

I thought you were attempting to potty train your husband at first.

Thanks for the un-intentional laugh.

[sadhearted]

Yeah I see I didn't specify. Could be confusing.

Glad I could make you laugh.

[sadhearted]

Well went to my H's. Was there a little over an hour. I ended up having to take the kids with me. We had a couple of laughing moments. I wouldn't say it was good or bad just there. I did find out for sure though that he's still planning on going to our S7's soccer tournament out of town. We'll be sharing a room.... When I first told him about it he had this look on his face like are you crazy so I wasn't sure he'd go. Tonight he told me he's still planning on going. Wonder how weird that'll be. Anyway he's going and that's a positive.

[789]

Isn't this where you wish you could turn to the last chapter in a book to see how it ends.

I am slowly getting the whole DB'ing thing down. Finally realize that I can't control anything but myself. I am slowly getting it. The one thing that I cannot grasp is the wondering about how it is all going to turn out and if I am right in doing what I am now doing.

Does anyone have the last chapter laying around, my copy had it torn out.

[789]

Oh yeah, you weren't suppose to take the kids.

[sadhearted]

I sure do... Yeah if you happen to find my last chapter let me know.

Though I wonder if I'll have my marriage in the end I know I'm doing what I have to no matter what. I can't help but wondering. I know all I have control over is me and I had to let go. Just hate not knowing.

Yeah wasn't supposed to but my mother kept pushing back her time so I just said I'll take them. I figured if I kept calling him to tell him oh sorry going to be later he'd end up saying don't bother... I had all ready heard you don't have to bring my pills soo.. I just took the kids.

[789]

I sure do... Yeah if you happen to find my last chapter let me know.

If I find it I will share it with all.

Though I wonder if I'll have my marriage in the end I know I'm doing what I have to no matter what. I can't help but wondering. I know all I have control over is me and I had to let go. Just hate not knowing.

That is the part I have issues with. I know what I am doing is what I have too, especially for myself. I have just seen so many or read so many that go the wrong way. I know that I will be fine with myself either way. It just seems the biggest part of our lives are put on hold, and someone lost the remote control to start it up again which ever way the ending goes. Just push the damn button to see the ending. I know very anti DB'ing, just my thoughts.

[789]

Meant to say everyones lives are put on hold, not just mine. Hers, mine, sons.

[sadhearted]

Yeah I'm not real fond of this hold pattern but if this is what it takes to get my marriage back then I'll hold. I have my rough times like last night. I felt like I don't know how much longer I can do this. And he's actually being positive so I'm not sure where that came from. Felt down most of today but I ended up going to his place so not to bad of an evening. AND when I got home he had all ready IM'ed me to thank me again!!!

[789]

I know it sucks.
I know how long I will hold on and do this, even if I bitch and moan in here. First is she gets pregnant by someone else or the judge says so . Other than that, I think I will hold out. Mainly because when she is done, she will file, till then I know something is still going on in her mind. I will not be the one to end our family.