In my peeking days I learned several things about them. I used some of it and it made her feel bad that she couldn't aknowlege it. They where going to watch The Notebook at the same time. When I called her from work that day I said how I wanted to be like that couple and grow old together.
Is that bad? Doing what I did?
My daughter was looking at her phone so I took it and read some of her texts. This is him talking 'I love you', 'I can't wait to see you', 'touch you', 'taste you'. I haven't looked at her phone since.
This is before DR. I think they wrote about me when it came to smothering her.
I did do things I came up with myself too like poetry. If you know me That is not natural. All the information is out there I just wasn't looking outside the box.
True....but don't beat yourself up about that....he is just saying and doing the things you weren't. Learn from it and don't forget it. Use this knowledge later on down the line.
They say that a second marriage with the same person without divorcing is better than the first. Why? Because you both have learned from your mistakes and that what you have learned can be incorporated into this "new" marriage. Doing things, saying the right things....COMMUNICATION....all come into play on the "new" relationship.
Switch - I think she is not done, just taking a break. At this point you might wait for her to prove that to you, but that would be my guess.
Next romantic trip she arranges, it should be made clear that the locks will be changed and her personal belongings would be waiting for her in garbage bags out front (for all the neighbors to see). Just like when a man defiantly cheats. Maybe with an envelope taped to the door with cash enough for a hotel room for the night.
And you should expose the affair to all involved, friends, relatives, grown children. See the marriagebuilders site.
She is losing respect for you that you tolerate all this (e.g. texting back and forth in front you -- I would have grabbed the phone and crushed it), and a woman cannot love a man she does not respect. You have indeed become her Gay Friend, maybe even "confidant", but if you have had prior experience with the confidant role you know it leads nowhere.
Maybe you wait for her to act out again, but you must stand up to her or she will leave you. Maybe you should even lean harder to make up for being such a milquetoast at the outset. She will be shocked and will scream at you, that is the evil inside her screaming at finally being opposed. If she is not shrieking at you when she finds out you exposed her affair, then something is wrong -- I want to see sweat beads on her forehead at some point, as the little man she thought she had control over suddenly becomes uncontrollable. Then that stage will pass, and you can go on to next steps.
I know what you mean. It would be so easy to tell the family what my W has done. But.... That would be the end. There would be no hope then. I even thought of threaten to tell but then if that changed her mind she would not be changing because she wanted to, It would be because of the threat. I don't want that either. I want her to want to stay. Otherwise we would just be delaying the inevitable. We have to be the ones to keep their
Secret to save our families.
I don't know your sitch but I do know with mine sooner or later if things do "go south". The family and freinds will know why. I will NOT take the secret to my death bed. Husband
Last edited by husband; 07/10/0703:16 AM.
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
