Switch - I think she is not done, just taking a break. At this point you might wait for her to prove that to you, but that would be my guess.
Next romantic trip she arranges, it should be made clear that the locks will be changed and her personal belongings would be waiting for her in garbage bags out front (for all the neighbors to see). Just like when a man defiantly cheats. Maybe with an envelope taped to the door with cash enough for a hotel room for the night.
And you should expose the affair to all involved, friends, relatives, grown children. See the marriagebuilders site.
She is losing respect for you that you tolerate all this (e.g. texting back and forth in front you -- I would have grabbed the phone and crushed it), and a woman cannot love a man she does not respect. You have indeed become her Gay Friend, maybe even "confidant", but if you have had prior experience with the confidant role you know it leads nowhere.
Maybe you wait for her to act out again, but you must stand up to her or she will leave you. Maybe you should even lean harder to make up for being such a milquetoast at the outset. She will be shocked and will scream at you, that is the evil inside her screaming at finally being opposed. If she is not shrieking at you when she finds out you exposed her affair, then something is wrong -- I want to see sweat beads on her forehead at some point, as the little man she thought she had control over suddenly becomes uncontrollable. Then that stage will pass, and you can go on to next steps.
