Had a rough time after work today. H was here (he and D16 had spent the day together). For the first time since this mess started I actually told H how angry I feel and how disappointed I am that he is already dating and moving on with his life and we haven't even filed for divorce yet. He asked why I thought he was dating and I mentioned the charge for an online dating service on our mastercard bill. Didn't mention the cell phone bill. Or all the money he is taking from the joint account. DUH! It makes me sad that I can't believe him. I so want to call all the unusual numbers on the cell phone bill and ask if they have gone out with him. I know that wouldn't help any except to show I can't trust him or I that I am really am a jealous, paranoid fool.
Need to find that high road again!!!! I'm slipping fast!
