Dude...to me, it sounds like you have a chance with your wife. It'll take some hard work so be prepared for it. At least she is making some positive comments to you...little hints of what you may NOT have done in the past....like the phone pic.
Having cheated on my ex mmmaaaaaaannnnnnnnnyyyyyyy moons ago, I can tell you already know, the "newness" of someone else is overwhelming. She may be getting the high from it right now because this OM says and probably shows (via email) things that you have not in the past. It has boiled done to your wife being bored in your marriage and the fact that you have cheated so why not her turn.
Work with the books say and post here to get somemore answers from past cheaters....most of this you should remember.....remeber what you said and did for that other person YOU messed with and that is EXACTLY what the OM is doing.
I have asked and all I get is that she is not interested in working on our marrage right now, even if OM wasn't in the picture.
I think if he was out of the picture she would open up a little. She says she doesn't want to hurt anybody and also says that's all she is doing right now. hurting me by not responding and hurting him by not divorcing or kicking me out.
What she is looking for from me right now is space. And what I lost was my ability to talk openly about anything and I wasn't sure about suggesting things about anything cause I didn't want to upset her. (my assertiveness)
My ex did some of the same things that yours is doing....her tanning became longer and longer and her cell phone? Couldn't pry it from her....always texting and so on and so on...pissed me off royally....hate the damn cell phones.
Yeah....no bobdy is saying to cut off the phone....or block the number....I was just saying that cell phones suck...and it is really bad when it comes down to this affair crap....they can talk ANYWHERE at ANYTIME.
She always liked going for walks. I gave up on them and tried to get her to go for bike rides. Before I knew anything she was going on 2 and 3 hour 'walks'.
Now I would give anything to go for a walk w/her.
Me 37 W 37 D21 D17 D12 S8 grandparents 7/07 boy Married 16 yrs last June 07 Bomb dropped 4/07
"Do what you feel in your heart to be right-for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't", Eleanor Roosevelt
I know....but don't feel hopeless....you remember how it peetered out for you...the newness and fun....and then HER faults.........this OM has his....she just hasn't seen them yet.
