Well now THAT sounds familiar! I did have to face having more knowledge about my parents financial situation than I probably should have as they edged up to losing the farm. I tried to protect my brothers and I also tried to help my mother as she was probably facing issues with depression. I have always said that basically I helped my mom out with her emotional issues which also left me feeling like I did not want to burden her with my issues. I usually figured out how to take care of myself without drawing attention and without needing or wanting much from others. Although that does not mean that others haven't helped me a lot because they have.
Learning to take care of yourself is good. Learning to hide things from people to protect their feelings is not good. Learning to hide and deny the fact that you want things is not good. Learning to take the blame for problems stemming from other people's mental disorders is not good.
And I'm not convinced that there's any harm in knowing your family's financial situation while growing up. As long as you don't feel responsible for it without actually having control over it. If bad times are coming, it's best that no one's taken by surprise any more than necessary, right? And when the kids move out, they'll have to know how much things cost and how much they should expect to make from various lines of work.
Originally Posted By: fearless
What might be my problem is that I am kind of proud of myself for dealing so well (well in context) with all of it. Not that it was easy but I feel good about the way things have turned for me despite having some tough times. (I just heard this phrase "If the mountain was smooth, you wouldn't be able to climb it" last weekend and I loved it)
You should be proud of dealing well with things. As long as you have a clear view of just how well you're dealing and what bad habits you still have to unlearn.
a fine and enviable madness, this delusion that all questions have answers, and nothing is beyond the reach of a strong left arm.
