New to this.....feeling down

[Sigh]

I wish I could have done that.....

It will get better, one day you will be able to. Don't expect too much from yourself right now...baby steps.

I will try to be nice to her from now on....but I don't want to be M like this.....it's not right

No it isn't.

Even apart, she continues to be abusive to me. I'll try to be more civil, but I feel the need to go and file and get her out of my mind

Of course you do, you are upset. Do you really think filing right now will get her out of your mind? The answer...

Nope it won't.

Come post your venting here...it helps...alot