I honestly don't know if he ever really loved me. I don't say that in a "woe is me" tone, though - I just don't know that he's really capable of love the same way I am. In fact, he's told me that he doesn't know what love is and doesn't know how to love (his words), although apparently that changed when he met his gf. I'm not sure that deep change can occur, however, when it is dependent on someone else. He thought he loved me at one time too.
I don't think my H's feelings are totally gone, but I don't know what remains. He is still somewhat uncertain around me and tries to impress me. He looks. The difference now is that what we had is not enough for me anymore, and he would have to make a lot of changes in order to make a M with me work - changes I don't think he has an interest in making, as it would be a lot of work. And who am I to ask him to do that? I don't know if he's happy now or not, but that's not my concern anymore.
I have to say that, for me, when I decided I was ready for the D, I was was FINALLY able to move ahead with my life. I really could not do that before. I know that other people can, but I just couldn't.
I hope your D is doing okay this evening.
N
Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about creating yourself My thread: Trusting God's Plan
