Been doing some thinking over the last day or so & i'm not sure how much longer I want this to go on. I don't think there is much I can do as regards my R, except to leave it well alone & that feels like I am doing nothing at all. I have not had any contact with W for just over two weeks, the last time I spoke to her was when she called me about picking up some of her dvd's. She says she wants to sort the D stuff out & said that she would come & talk about it, she has not done so. I know that time is on my side with that but I have to say that I don't think I want that time.
This may be a little frustration coming out of me but I really am very close to just calling her & saying get the f**king D started. I am sick of it, She says she wants it but does nothing about it except to tell me I have to file myself. At the moment I won't do that but I want to tell her to get on with it, if she wants it. She has to know that I don't give a crap what she wants & she is responsable for the choices she has made for herself.
Right now I can't help but think, she is thinking that i'm sat waiting in the wings for her to change her mind & that she can just walk right back if things dont quite work out for her. She has to know that may not be the case. Maybe she thinks I cant take the thought of D & thats why she has not done anything or said anything else on the matter? she also has to know that I can, I would sign those dam papers right now.
If she has doubts about her actions & choices thats her problem to sort out,i'm getting passed caring. I'm sure the OM & her suppoting friends will help her through it, they've played a part in all along, so carry on.
Thats the end of my little rant as I could go on for quite some time.
