Living with my WAW 3

[SuperDad]

Journaling:
Just booked a room on the beach for our mini-vacation on the way out to visit friends and family in TX. Talked to wife yesterday a bit and today at more length about vacation plans. The difference was amazing. Maybe some of the way I handled it, but yesterday when her friend was over and they had been drinking wine together, she was in a totally pissy mood about everything I said. Today was much more upbeat.

She definitely wants/expects me to take the lead on just about everything. So I did, I booked the hotel without any consultation. Also taking care of the logistics of most stuff.

I think this applies to just about everything in our lives. She will be happier if I take charge!? I have been thinking about taking over finances and just giving her a set budget to deal with her stuff. This has potential for great conflict, but if at the same time I give a carrot like having things done around the house that I have put off for years, maybe she will find it a good thing?

One other thing happened today. Her car died when she was out alone. She called me, I came to her "rescue", figured out that it was the starter, got the car towed to the garage, and then let her take my car for the day. She was very appreciative and made a joke that she would make German food for dinner as my "reward". (It was already on the menu.) I think this is a double edged sword as I was her "rescuer" in this case, but she only needed to be rescued because she has an old car, which I would have already replaced if it weren't for the sitch.

At some point, I am just going to have to put down an ultimatum, but for now I am sticking with the Do Nothing strategy where our R is concerned and focusing on living my life as best I can.

As usual insight is welcome/appreciated!

SD