Quote:
All the things he never did for me, he does now without me, like going hiking, seeing films, watching concerts. Babies, expenses, work, and excuses kept us from going out together but now it is some kind of priority now thart we are so lonely.

OMG! Exactly!

Last night my H admitted that he had become complacent over the years and dependent on my being the initiator, which I had become by default. Apparently this realization hit him the night I left. (I have LOST COUNT how many times he and I had discussions about this very issue when we were together.I mean, back and forth dialogue, the works. The whole time I thought it was sinking in. Guess not! )

What, is this universal among H's? Once you're married you can coast until you hit a boulder?

Of course, this can't happen without the W letting it on some level. So I have to take responsibility for that. Hmmm. Evidently nagging is not an effective deterrent to coasting \:\) (Note to self: improve interpersonal communication skills)

How long have you been separated? How long has this new behavior been in place? Do you think it will last? Do you think any of it spite on your H's part? My first H was very transparent that way and spite (i.e. anger & hurt) drove a LOT of his behavior when we split.