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Quote:
I got home and called H on his gf's phone.

You are very strong. I refuse to call him on his gf's cell. No way hose.

Hope your vacation was everything you dreamed it would be.

Neli


*******************************
Both: 33
Together 13y; Married 8y
Kids: DD8 and DS5
Separated: 08/31/06
D Filed: 2/21/07

my current story
neli #1118441 07/02/07 05:11 PM
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Hi Nicola! Hope you're loving your holiday.

I've been reading a book called "Pretty Little Mistakes"--it's a choose your own adventure book for adults. Very fun. One of my favorite "lives" was when I bacame a revenge artist. People hired me to get back at whomever was causing them grief. No one was killed or anything, I just got to mess with them. I can totally do the 2x4 hit on H for you! \:\)


amd
amd #1122068 07/05/07 04:02 PM
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Hello everyone!

Thanks for your good thoughts. AMD - that book sounds good. I loved those "choose your own adventure" books as a kid. I will check it out.

I had an amazing time on my vacation!!

It started off not too great w/ H's best friend taking the same flight as us w/ his son, new gf (he left his W just after H left me) and her d. Ugh! I was charming, but not pleased.

Disney itself was really magical, as it should be. I really relaxed and enjoyed myself, as did the children. I had a better time than I would have had w/ H, I think. I feel like I've found my spontaneous, fun side again. H was/is so cynical and always trying to prove how smart he is by being "above" actually enjoying little things. This isn't much fun to be around, and I felt very uninhibited.

There were mostly two-parent families there, but that didn't bother me, as I had thought it might. Rather, I thought about what fun they were having and how it would not have been the same if H had been there. Also, the kids and I have spent so much time as just the three of us over the years, that it actually felt normal.

I also saw quite a number of young couples, travelling alone and getting their photos taken with Mickey and friends. Again, I didn't feel sad or jealous; I wished them well (in my head!) and just smiled to see them having such a good time together. I know that I will have that in the future. And it will probably be better than my M ever was.

I had a bit of a setback when I returned, as there was a problem w/ our flight and my wallet got stolen; my bag was also badly damaged. Thus, we came home exhausted, and I was pretty stressed - did NOT want to see or talk to H. He did come to see the kids the next day (Tues) and took them out for a picnic w/ his gf. Ticked me off b/c he never did that with me, but I'm not dwelling on it. Then, last night, they all (H, kids, gf, her kid) went to my IL's to celebrate SIL's birthday.

I don't want to go on about this b/c I just want to put it out of my mind. One funny thing is that my MIL called to see if we were back b/c H hadn't called her. She said, "It's your ex- MIL calling! ha ha ha" I think she was nervous and didn't know what to say. Anyway, I said, "Actually, you're still my MIL b/c WE'RE STILL MARRIED!" I didn't yell, but said it with emphasis. She said, "Oh, ha ha ha, oh that's wonderful, ha ha ha, I'm still your MIL." I got off the phone ASAP b/c I'm still so mad at them for (a) not stepping up when H left; (b) bringing H up the way they did; and (c)treating the gf as part of the family when we're not even D'd. I find that very disrespectful of my M.

Anyway, this anger is an area I need to work on.

Other than that, H is acting all nervous and uncertain around me. Probably b/c I've got my groove back and am not putting up with any BS, nor am I interested in a R with him, other than as co-parents.

My dog is still sick and needs meds 5 times a day at specific times, so it's a job in itself to take care of her!

I will post some Disney pics on myspace.

Love to you all,
Nicola


Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about creating yourself
My thread: Trusting God's Plan
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Anger by Thich Nhat Hanh

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Welcome back. Spending time with the kids is priceless. Your head is on straight concerning H.

And yes, you will be going to Disney Land with that special someone. Sooner than later I expect.


Jeff

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Nic,
I'm glad you had a good holiday. I know how you feel about in-laws treating OW like part of the family. My MIL 'protects' OW as much as she does H. I have told her how that makes me feel. Didn't get me anywhere but at least now she knows.


Me 43
XH 45
M 2.7.88
Divorce 7.10.09
Kids D20,S17 & D15
ACJ #1122663 07/05/07 10:58 PM
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Welcome back....nic.....FIB


Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11)
Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t
Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10
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Nicola: glad you had a great time. Kids and I are headed there in December. Can't wait.
Quote:
(b) bringing H up the way they did;


Unfortunately his mom only had so much to do with how he is acting. I believe that our kids in the end choose who they will be. We can't take a 2x4 over their head and beat it out of them. I am lucky that my MIL still hasn't been put into the situation of meeting the gf. I know I would have issues, but I also know I am not in control of that.

Keep going forward. Yes, you will have that happiness again.

Neli


*******************************
Both: 33
Together 13y; Married 8y
Kids: DD8 and DS5
Separated: 08/31/06
D Filed: 2/21/07

my current story
neli #1123670 07/06/07 07:14 PM
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Nic,

Congrats on the enjoyable vacation! Dang it, on the wallet issue!

All in all, I say the good times rolled all over you and the kids.

Steve

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Catching up on YOU, Nicola. Thanks for stopping by my thread. (Wish we didn't have so much in common, though)
Matilda

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