Hi all Its 3.15 am in CK land and I have been through the toughest night of my life. To put my kids through that kind of pain is almost impossible. They were so good though we talked and then played a game together or two to tale thier minds off the reality. Me and W havebeen up talking to now ( after 3.00 ) we have not talked like this for a long time . W asked me , if I want to come back . I baulked on the answer and she was hurt. we talked and talked , both listened to each other it was the worst and best night for ever. I have faith that she will be OK and me as well.
We have both had other people getting in our ears about what we should do but have agreed to do what we feel is best for our kids. We still trust each other and this is huge. No matter what the outside world throws at us we will do whats right.
W sees this as temporary , I see it as the way things will be so I guess there is hope for us. We sat together talking and holding hands for hours , I told W that I did not want our old R ever, We talked about the changes and she has taken the 5LL book to read, she has noticed the better R I have had with the kids. I have a cautious hope now .
