"We" filed for divorce 2 times in the 18 months he was gone...we did get 5 days from being final once...and ironically the last filing is still "pending"...we have extended the date 6 times...the last 2 times having to physically appear before a judge and "ask permission" to have more time to work things out...our next date is Sept 4th...the 3 year anniversary (if I should call such a thing an anniversary) of his leaving me...I think we will reduce to a legal seperation only because he has some huge financial issues to clear up so as not to affect me and my good credit!
So filing...being served...and realistically even have a divorce become final doesn't necessarily mean things are "forever" over...I do think if my D had become final that eventually we would have still worked back together...it just might have taken longer...
My main point was moving on doesn't "have to include another R with someone"...and probably for most it shouldn't...because the hurt we all have experienced needs time to heal...and if we put a bandaid on it...the healing is slowed down...and sometimes it heals over the top leaving a wound to fester and come up later...the longer your R/M was I think the longer this time is...and I fought it...but looking back it (time) is what helped me become my best...and feel good about myself not because of someone else making me feel good...
