I don't see why you can't draw a boundary and be nice about it.
because that particular boundary, (or the result of violating it) aren't nice.
If the person doesn't comply with the boundary, I don't see how that makes YOU the azz. didn't say that it did
...And non-placating behavior is what I see as the fuel for attraction, In my experience, it was fuel for anger and resentment, and "placating" at least quelled some of that. neither was fuel for attraction. ...not threats of being dumped (which is a threat, not a boundary), its the same exact result, which, to me, means that it means exactly the same thing. "half full/half empty"...the slightly positive or slightly negative spin is ancillary. the main message is that some vessel is filled to 50% of its capacity; expressing it optimistically or pessimistically doesn't change anything; the fact remains the same. Its like dealing with a car salesman. "we prefer "more affordeable" to "cheap""... "oh-cut-the-bs-and-just-tell-me-how-much-the-f@king-thing-costs" to ME, "IWNLIASM" is car-salesman-speak for "have really hot sex with me or I'm going to dump your sorry azz".
