For the last few weeks I think I have become more detatched also. When I have called W I did so with the thoughts that I had to do so, things that appeared to be important at the time, financial things & such. Now as I sit here, I can see that I did'nt really need to call her for most of those anyway. I could have sorted whatever out, without speaking to W about it at all. So looking back I more than likely, on occasion used it as an excuse to create contact with her. As I have always stated those calls were friendly & happy & a few times, there was maybe some tiny tiny steps forward, making her laugh & her asking what i've been upto. I question this somtimes & ask myself should I continue to call weekly & see where it goes. Right now though I don't feel that there is anything I have to call her for. Calling & saying Hi & trying to engage her in small talk would just seem so unatural & odd to me now.
So for now I am not calling her for anything at all. I am going to see how that goes & maybe she'll call & maybe she wont, thats her choice But, if I can see that my calls have not been as nesersery as I first thought then she will see the same thing, execept I would imagine she would have seen it first?
I don't know if it's part of detachment or maybe part of just giving up (which I hope it is not)But I now see quite clear that if she wanted to talk then she would call & talk, very simple facts, she would call & talk if she indeed had any feelings of wanting to do so.
