I just need to keep telling myself she is gone from this R, and I am going to move on.
I guess the real question is, do you want to move on? Or do you want her to re-commit to you and your family? Because from what i am reading, you said "if she wants back she WILL go to all the counseling we need and she WILL freakin stop lying about her affair, admit she had one and made a mistake....". Is that the only way you want her back? Because there is a chance she will not admit to her A being wrong but she still wants to reconcile. It could have been something she needed at the time. Not saying it's right, but it may be what she feels. And the counseling will be more for you to get over what she has done. That is an individual thing. You two need counseling to figure out why she had the A.
