Hey! I wasn't done with that Post! so here's more. So Saffie, yes, men are probably more visual than women (not that women aren't visual too), but it's not the most important thing.
Tyler, I think I know what you mean. It's part of the detaching. You are probably not "judging" or even really critisising her body, but it's a way of detaching. And maybe it's partly because they have detached from us. If my W looked at me and said ILY, I'd thing she was the most beautiful, sexy, woman in the world. Knowing she can't or won't say that and that she doesn't feel that for me, she definately has become less attractive to me.
What do you think? Plausable?
Absolutely. I'm not judging her at all. As my SIL said to me recently, "you should at least get points for the big period". Honestly, I didn't really notice. She was the love of my life, we were partners in this, the weight gain, whether temporary due to hormonal issues or permanent due to whatever, just didn't matter. Even after losing the weight, the issues associated with losing so much, ie; loose skin, sagging, etc., just didn't matter..., until the bomb. Not even then. I think it began several months ago after hearing for almost a year, basically how unlovable I am to her. Something has started to shutoff.
My IC related it to attempting to sit at a table with people that keep getting up and walking to another table. After while you find a different table and the resolve to sit at your table alone and be content with that. (context of alone due to me telling IC I don't want to be with someone else, it isn't about that.) He quoted the Apostle Paul, something about in all circumstances I am content. Telling me that contentment is my choice, much like love.
