Thanks for checking in. That boundaries book did come in, but I haven't gotten very far with it since H was here. But so far I think it's what I need. While H was around this past week, dealing with S4 was a million times easier, of course. But I need to work on how I handle him on my own. S4 is also enjoying the PreK summer school program very much. In fact, S4 told me he likes "the pretty girl in class." I asked him what her name was and he didn't know. So I suggested he ask and the next day he came back and told me her name. Then we saw her at the park yesterday and S4 spent over an hour running around the playground with her. She dragged him around by the arm a lot and he loved every bit of it. So cute.
I am still dealing with the school district over what school he will go to, assuming he goes to kindergarten, but I think things will turn out for the best.
H spent a week and a half here and I took him back to the airport this afternoon. But this time we'll see him again in another couple weeks, instead of a year from now. And he'll be much closer than before. So it wasn't such a stressful goodbye. But it was still a little depressing.
The visit went well. H was very sweet about my birthday. He actually got the date wrong and the look of frustration and disappointment on his face when he found out was the best birthday present ever-wait...that's twisted. I mean to say, it was obvious he had plans and had put significant thought into my birthday before he got here. I didn't care at all that he'd gotten the date wrong. It was so cute when he tried to secretly enlist S4 to sign a card and bring me a cupcake. I could here H trying to talk S4 into cooperating in the other room, but S4 just didn't have the attention span. It was funny and sweet.
When I got back from the airport this afternoon I just felt aimless and mildly depressed. And S4 kept asking me what he could do, i.e. he was bored and didn't know what to do. We both got used to having H around real fast. With H, there's someone to coordinate the daily details with. A four squared meal gets prepared, the kitchen gets cleaned up, plans are discussed for the next day. On my own, I'm lucky if we even eat an actual meal in the evening instead of snacking through it. I tend to long term goals, but if I'm out of my work routine, I wonder through the day half-hazardly.
H called as soon as his plane landed safely on the other side. We hadn't discussed a phone call, but I had a feeling he would as soon as he landed and it just showed that he got used to us pretty fast too. I told him we missed him already and he said that he missed us too and I could hear it in his voice.
I still don't know much about our long term living situation, whether or not H is being promoted and moving again soon. Like I said earlier, I didn't press him any more about whether or not he wanted us to live with him wherever he went. I figure he will come to a conclusion about that when he's around us more often, if he hasn't figured it out already. Even my mom mentioned that he certainly looks and acts like a man who wants to be with his family. But he has been unable/willing to verbally assure me that he wants us to live together for some reason.
We did discuss my work situation a little and H supports me in the changes I want to make. All in all, I feel pretty good about things at the moment. I'm not having that continuous orgasm that I still seem to believe is my proper due in this life. But, things are getting better.
